For some, choosing a Maid of Honor is easy. It may be the same best friend you’ve had since you were a child, maybe it’s the best friend you made in collage –perhaps you’ve promised someone they’d be your MOH years ago, and now that you’ve set the date, she’s ready to turn in her “right-hand-gal” ticket she’s had on layaway.
But for many others, it’d be easier to scale Everest with greased hands that choose between friends. And while we can’t tell you definitively who to choose, we can give you some helpful tips to arrive at that decision with thought and care.
- It’s a Job
Okay, it’s a fun job, of course. You’re not likely to find someone saying, “I’m so tired. I can’t believe I Maid of Honored for twelve hours today.” But that doesn’t change the reality: being MOH comes with a lot of responsivities, such as:
- Making sure everyone make it to the dress fittings
- Directing the other bridesmaids
- Organizing the bridal shower and bachelorette party
- Act as your Chief Assistant on your wedding day. This can be as simple as keeping back-up makeup ready, or as complex as being your emotional and morale support and keeping everyone constantly updated on your status.
For that reason:
- Stress Management is Key
Everyone handles stress differently. For most, it isn’t a simple always-calm or always-shaken binary: meaning many people operate fine under stresses that they know (professions, passions, etc.), while still folding under new or unskilled situations. Think the guitar player who never seems to get stage fright all of a sudden stammering and falling over their words while having to give a speech.
So you’ll want to consider management or public event experience in a MOH. It could be as simple as pointing out a time things didn’t go as planned, who kept a cool head and got everyone out of the woods. Like any event, setbacks and unforeseen problems can happen during a wedding. A good MOH has to be your center of calm. Because, let’s be real: chances are, you’ll have trouble remaining calm.
Of course these skills point out what a perfect MOH would be. None of us are perfect. A wedding, like everything else, is a story waiting to happen and be told, and many of the best stories involve unlikely heroes rising to the challenge and finding strength they never knew they had. So while the skills we listed above do help, you also shouldn’t be afraid to go with your sister or best friend, even if they might not seem perfect for the job. Give them a chance to surprise you, or better yet, surprise themselves.